Thousand: Four Hundred Forty-Five

In a rickety gazebo (“It’s a collectible!”) in a field back of the main house (“Cut down the weeds and we have hoedowns.”) the innkeeper (“’Inn The Way,’ haha. Funny, no? Inn the way to hell! Hell! You crazy kids. Why the hell you want go there?”) brings Bernie and Sir (“What you need, my dear Sir, is a good brushing.”) ham and cheese omelettes (“Hard to slice pig thin when he struggle, but I do it because ham best fresh.”) with Sir served on the floor and Bernie served on a rusting metal table. “You already put sugar in